


Buzz Off!

by misumaru



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gen, Trash Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2020-01-11 08:49:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18427145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misumaru/pseuds/misumaru
Summary: A duel with the legendary son of Sparda doesn't quite go the way one unlucky demon was hoping...





	Buzz Off!

**Author's Note:**

> For the fan_flashworks challenge 'light', and the bingo square 'ghosts and gore'. Thanks to LdyBastet for the beta! :)

This was it, this was his big moment - he, of course, being King of the Beelzebub, lord of flies and filth and faithful general of Mundus. 

Had he not served tirelessly in the battles against the hated rebel Sparda? Had not the blood of thousands of slaughtered foes dripped from his mandibles as he grew in size and power? And now Mundus was dead, along with those fools Phantom and Griffin and anyone else who might have stood in his way in his path to becoming the new ruler of the Underworld. This was the perfect opportunity to prove his worth, to succeed where they had all failed. The spawn of the wretched Sparda was in front of him, undoubtedly the prelude to a fated battle that he would retell over and over once he ascended to the throne, and…

And…

He was being ignored!

Beelzebub buffeted his wings once or twice, an insectile buzz accompanying the blast of wind they sent round the arena.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Yeah, sure.” Dante shrugged, hair fluttering in the breeze. “I was just wondering how big a fly swatter I’m going to need.”

_Fly swatter?_ The sheer insolence! Beelzebub bristled – what, did this man think he was facing one of his lesser brethren? His mandibles clicked together violently. “You dare insult me?”

“Hey, chill, chill. I’m just saying, if you want to buzz off, now would be a good time.”

This was not how Beelzebub had pictured things. Where was the noble duel for the ages? The exchange of two worthy combatants acknowledging each other’s strength? 

Well… If anyone asked, he could always lie.

Beelzebub lunged forward without warning, spraying acid around him as he moved. The ground hissed and steamed where his venom had landed, but there was no sign of his foe – melted or otherwise.

A shot rang out from behind him as pain lanced through one of his wings. It fluttered uselessly, ichor dripping from the ragged hole the bullet had torn in it, as he turned to see Dante standing in the very spot where he’d been moments before, arms folded and apparently completely unconcerned.

“That’s some serious bad breath you’ve got going there! Need a mint?”

Perhaps he had underestimated his foe. After all, idiot or not, he still had Sparda’s blood and that meant power. That mistake would not be made again. Beezlebub readied his strongest attacks and launched himself directly at Dante.

It missed. In fact, he kept missing. Every time he took aim or tried to swipe at his foe, Dante simply wouldn’t be there, and every miss was rewarded with another bullet in his side, until it seemed there wasn’t a single place to take step in the lair without becoming smeared with blood or venom.

Worse, the man just wouldn’t shut up - endless taunts flying just as freely as his bullets as they danced around the arena. Combined with the pain it made it hard to think and he started swinging wildly, throwing his head back to let out a frustrated buzz. “Why won’t you take this seriously?”

Dante was in front of him again, not a single scratch on him and sword in hand. He didn’t even look tired, the only evidence of their fight the odd splash of blood on his gleaming silver hair. Then he moved so quickly it barely even registered as a blur. One moment, Dante was swinging his sword, the next blood gushed from Beelzebub’s thorax in a torrent as his body separated in two. How…? He truly was the son of Sparda.

His legs and wings twitched sporadically as he sank down into a pool of his own blood. The last thing Beelzebub registered as his consciousness dimmed and faded was Dante’s voice mocking him one final time.

“That serious enough for ya?”


End file.
